The barrier between us and our dreams.

We come to this life to face experiences and challenges that build the person we are today. Certain experiences have moments that become rooted within our subconscious forever and these moments would be the root cause of any triggers and characteristics we develop in the future. When these moments occur, they are usually traumatic and because going back in time to change the course of history is impossible, we make up stories. With an infinite imagination, we create the why and the what of that moments, we give it reasons and judgments, we live by that story for the future and we allow it to dictate our impressions for the new experiences to come.

We go with our lives thinking that the shield we created is protective and it won’t allow any harm to come by, the truth is, that shield is stopping the opportunities to come to us and more specifically the desires we chase after. These barriers are called limiting beliefs. They are an illusion of protective mechanisms that we create and store in our subconscious, on the surface, they are healthy coping mechanisms keeping us away from harm, and the more you dig into them the more you know about yourself. They can be initially identified through your reaction towards an event or concept in particular. For example, physical intimacy with a romantic partner, a simple phrase but if it gives you a sense of fear or any resistance then it will be a good idea to explore it. Ultimately, all limiting beliefs narrow down to a base which is “I am not good enough” and understanding your thoughts without labeling them as the “truth” is the key to changing those beliefs.

The thoughts we use to create and imagine our said truths have no power unless we give it to them and unfortunately the patterns end up in forgetting that we even have the power, to begin with, which leads us to get enslaved by the same negative thoughts we gave power to. Identifying the belief and being aware of it is the first key step to positive change, the second is to take responsibility for your emotions and stop blaming the universe for putting you in this position and thirdly, choose the logic to break these beliefs down by taking a moment to think to yourself about the actual evidence that backs these thoughts. Do you believe that you are not good-looking enough to share a moment of physical intimacy with a partner? If so, then where is the evidence? Did someone specifically tell you that or was it you who said that to yourself, did you actually go through bad experiences or did you convince yourself you were going to suck anyway without even trying?

The truth is. You can either have what you want in life or your reasons for not having it, nothing is stopping you except for the thoughts you gave power to. Taking back the responsibility for how you feel is what will ignite the change and instead of blaming the world for how you feel do something about it and own up to the neglect you put yourself through. 

It’s not too late to change and you can start here.

You can know more about the formation of limiting beliefs from childhood here.

Written By: Zaina Armoush